One morning in 2010, I couldn’t tie my own shoes. To be fair, I couldn’t have tied anyone’s shoes that day. I was going to be late for work. So there I was, in my early thirties needing help tying my shoes. Already? My hips wouldn’t bend, my hamstrings were just stiff rods, my feet a million miles away. Pain, stiffness, insomnia followed by inability to fully wake up. Depression- a muddy, awful blur, and that foot on my chest each morning. Well, I could live with that. But, I couldn’t tie my shoes, and that was really going to be a problem. Not that the other symptoms were not. I had no energy. Exhausted, I was cancelling stand up shows and avoiding my friends. My memory wasn’t great and I was forgetting people’s names, those of people I knew well.
Back to my shoe problem. Not ready for Velcro I went to see my doctor. I told her my symptoms, and she asked if I had my thyroid tested. I had not. What is a thyroid? It must be a pretty big deal if it can turn me into a sad marionette. My results came back from my TSH blood test and I was borderline “hypothyroid”. I had many of the symptoms, some severe, but they were also symptoms of many other conditions, and I feel very lucky that my doctor tested my thyroid. The potential to be misdiagnosed, especially with depression, is very high. She sent me home with a prescription.
I had no idea what any of this meant, but I felt like I had an answer. I took the medication. Everything was going to be great! I gently patted myself on my back. And then, a few weeks later, my hair started to fall out. In clumps.
This blog is about what the past four years have been like as I navigate (with humour and compassion on most days) my 2013 diagnosis of Hashimoto’s Disease, the reason why my hands are so cold, and why I want to lay down on your couch. Oh, and if you have something sweet, I’d like that too.